Join the most popular community of Irish swingers now
Login
eponymous
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 56
0 km · Wexford
Forum
Although this deviates from Alan-Ball's original post, I am compelled to say that some forms of feminism have actually been a disservice to women. Certain factions that wish to paint women as victims and therefore expect some sort of reparations don't help in the struggle for true equality.
I'm not going to go into elaborate detail as this can be googled, but there is now a movement called masculism. So new a term, in fact, as I type this it shows up as a mis-spelled word. But in a nutshell it's a movement by men who feel they may need to claw back some of the rights they have lost due to feminism.
I'm not going to go into elaborate detail as this can be googled, but there is now a movement called masculism. So new a term, in fact, as I type this it shows up as a mis-spelled word. But in a nutshell it's a movement by men who feel they may need to claw back some of the rights they have lost due to feminism.
Some things I can think of straight away...it's given men a sense of their own independence. It's given us a new perspective, what I believe to be a healthy one, on life in general. It's allowed us to embrace our own previously considered exclusively feminine qualities.
To speak from my own perspective....
I grew up in a family situation where for the longest time my father worked and my mother stayed home and minded my siblings and I as well as the household. A little later she went to work, facing the proverbial "glass ceiling", training up people for jobs that paid much higher that she wasn't "eligible" for. Mainly because she didn't attend college. Her parents didn't believe it was necessary for a girl to go to college.
All the while still minding us and our home.
Now my father, gods love him, was raised up to think the man was the head of the household, etc. Women were meant to be domestic slaves, and so forth. I witnessed this as well as my mother's anger with this.
Although that is what she supposedly "signed on for" when getting married in the early sixties, I knew that something was just not right about the whole thing from an early age. My mom was what I would consider a feminist even though she probably wasn't aware of it herself. I've heard her say "yes dear" but I've also heard "fucking get it yourself".
As I grew older, I became more aware of feminism, I guess one could say, as I met more and more women from outside of my inner circle.
Long story short...
I am able to say that I can survive on my own as a single man without starving to death or drowning in my own filth. I don't know if my father or his contemporaries could say the same. At the same time it's given me an appreciation of what women have been doing all along. In addition, it allows me to be in a relationship with a woman who is strong and independent and wise. To some this may be an aversion, even in this day and age, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I've raised my son this way as well. I remember him saying to me when very young, "I don't like wimpy girls". My 3 year old daughter was recently in a costume shop and the attendant asked her if she was looking for a nurses uniform. She adamantly insisted on a doctor uniform. My point is that as parents, we are able to give this sense to our kids. And it gives me hope that the trend will steadily continue until the term "feminism" is something that is read about in schools as something that was once necessary in order for the growth of our society but is necessary no longer.
Yes...the ol adage that every woman is 3 margaritas away from a girl on girl encounter...i don't agree.
I believe everyone..man or woman is bi to a certain degree. In other words sexuality isn't black and white; it's different colors on a spectrum. A spectrum which ranges from outright heterosexual to outright gay and everything in between. That's what I believe true.
Now on to stereotypes...
As far as the profiles....Yes there are quite a number of bi lads and girls on site, but there are loads (ladies especially) who say they are bi on profile simply because it helps broaden meet potential. This doesn't take away from those who are genuinely bi nor does it mean that people who 'fib" on their profiles are up to something wrong as the tick boxes on profiles don't really accommodate a spectrum. On the other side of the coin there are men who say they are straight who are far from it. One of those things that is sad but true. Sad that people feel they have to do this and it's a societal thing.
Be who you are.
I'm gonna take a stab at this Alan-Ball...
I reckon the reasoning behind the profiles you mention is that some folks don't want to interfere with what could be an unstable relationship. It takes a while for partners, married or not, to develop trust with each other. This is vital, I believe, to swing. The couple must know that it is all just a bit of fun and when they wake up the next day there won't be any strange feelings happening. The last thing a person wants, be they single or a couple, is to go for a night or two of fun and end up as the one who destroyed a relationship. This, I believe is just a personal preference that these folks have on their profiles. I don't believe it is disrespectful to people who are in more casual circumstances. Just a personal preference that some may have based on their own experiences.
Very compelling point Buxy. To flip the coin, there is no guarantee that if someone is using a condom in a photo they would be inclined to use one regularly. Trust is very important in this world we call Swing. Sometimes it's all we have to go on. Integrity is what is needed. Take care of yourselves people. Take care of others as if it were yourself. Could mean a difference between life or death.
Well I find it's best to start at the small bit at the top....but then you kinda have to go down a bit further and mind that part because you don't really want it just dripping uncontrollably. Once you make sure the rest is well minded then you can go back to the top and finish it off. And so you get it on your fingers maybe... and all over your face... but that's part of the fun yes?
Just to elaborate on what midnightchat said earlier....
Users have been and will continue to be instructed by the mods to paste unwanted or rude whispers in open chat. This helps the mods identify immediately if action should be taken. This is sometimes taken advantage of. The mods are very keen to suss out such fake complaints. Yes this an adult site. It has rules for the benefit of all users. Adults are expected to act with manners. This site may be stricter than some others when it comes to the rules, however other sites which allow indiscriminate free for all behavior make for quite unpleasant user experience at times. Finally, while this site is not a dictatorship, and as mods we try to allow people the most freedom possible, it also is not a democracy here. It is in fact a privately owned site and members agree to the rules (regardless if they read them or not) when they join here.
I just wanted to add...necpl of course you are entitled to your rant. And no you won't be lynched for it. This thread has provided an opportunity to clarify a few things.
In my opinion Ageism doesn't apply in the swing world.
It doesn't mean one doesn't like a person due to their age. Or that they are less capable or less of a person; it only means people would rather have a relationship of sorts within their own preferable age group.
Whenever blanket assumptions or prejudices are put forth in regard to age then yes. That is ageist. Also rude and insensitive.
Knock,
smith5001 has it pretty close. In American vernacular, it usually refers to a serial dater who may have more than one partner "on the hook" at any given time. Can refer to male or female but usually to males. This is derogatory when applied by those who are in search of a steady or monogamous partner. Thus the term..."Don't hate the player, hate the game."
You're right though, Knock, in wondering how that applies here in a NSA environment.
My interpretation of the original question is as follows:
If you are with an ex...keyword ex.... of someone on the site, can or does it cause resentment?
Perhaps it does. But after all, nearly all of us are someone's ex. Either from the site or off site.
Regardless, it should be handled with respect and maturity.
It's a bit different when it comes to this site because under normal circumstances our ex-partners are for the most part left in the past. Whereas on here, you may continue to see them in chat, on cam with another or even at a party or meet and greet. Can make for some touchy situations. Discretion and decorum are always paramount on here, as well as mutual respect. Also, I don't believe that anyone "steals" anyone else. People make decisions of their own free will. Folks should be allowed to move on and pursue happiness without the fear of an ex blurting out a statement in public, such as mentioning the mole shaped like Lithuania on their ex's inner thigh, and so forth. Highly disrespectful and very bad form.
So I reckon if any of this makes a woman OR man a slag, then either we are all one big happy pack of slags or none of us are. I believe the latter as it's akin to telling an atheist to go to hell. It just simply doesn't apply.
Finally, people should disclose as much or as little as they wish. People make their own decisions and are responsible for them. That said, if someone asks a potential partner if they are married, etc., they deserve an honest answer.
Quote by user=mjjxxx
I understand that there is a thread already here regarding whispers....but i dont want to post there.....because i am here to let off steam!
I read Sherris post in the whispers thread and I agree with the whole concept of ignoring whispers and letting them past over you.
I do that...always have....and always will...unless they are crude or persistant.
Howver.....this evening i was getting so many whispers that I was missing the private converstion I was having with someone.....yes i was whispering.....so yes i chose to have my whispers enabled.
But I didnt NOT choose to have so many whisperers.
I ignored for a long time these persistant whisperers....but when i asked.....in main chat for them to stop....i was told to ignore them!
Ok.....normally.......this is what i do do.......but when i explained that i was trying to ignore them...and that i only reuquested politely.....for them to stop.....I was told to be an adult!!!!!!!
I wasnt rude....nor pissed off by my whispers....I just wanted to be able to carry on my conversation without having to find my friends posts. Hence why i asked please could people stop whispering me...I also asked that if they wanted to....to ask me in main chat and to get a reply of a yes from me in mian chat.
I for one have always stood up for the mods and their roles. Its a tough job.......but to tell someone to be an adult, when I was trying to handle things in a polite and adult like manner......well....honestly.........i am hurt.
what i actually said ...was this ......eponymous: well, we are all adults here , just ignore them .
Thank you Zaza!!!
As an American, I know that so many of us still struggle to find something positive to take from that day.
Flight 93 came down only miles from where I lived in Pennsylvania and I have often driven past the memorial trying to make some sense of what happened.
Anyway thanks again zaza. This post... It warms me heart.
:thumbup:
Zaza, may i offer an opinion as a parent myself....
I think parents...all parents should get more involved in all aspects of the education system. Band together proactively. Perhaps organize some volunteer "bus parents" to go along with pick ups and deliveries of the students. Even have a clipboard of sorts with a rating system and notes. Ask to see all licenses and other vetting documents. Insist upon it. These are our kids ffs. And don't take no for an answer from the bus companies.
I have to say I think the forums are for the most part great. I remember when the forums were very little used and then went on to be a right mess. Now they are pretty well organized and well kept.
I'm not a fan of threads going off topic but I think peeps have to police themselves there. Also not a fan of the forums being used to have a go at anyone. If someone has a complaint about another, the site provides proper channels for that. The main purpose of the forums is to entertain and inform.
Sure, it's ok for some of the threads to have little or nothing to do with swinging. I don't think that is a prerequisite for posting by any means. After all, we are just people with everyday lives and issues.
Now...how would I improve it or what would I add?
Well, for a start.. It's been requested in the past to have a dedicated bi-sexual thread. I would also go further and say perhaps a TV/CD and a Transgender thread. Also, and this is a big one for me.... A search feature where one can search by user name, keyword etc. or at least a sort feature... sort by date, etc. I think this would be more helpful now as the forum increases in size. This wouldn't go amiss in the stories section either. Ok i'm spent for now. I need to sleep it off. Typical man aye?
LB point taken.
Just something for all to consider...if the room limits were raised to say 100...would there not be similar complaints? Although admin based this decision on feedback from many users complaining of the rooms being too slow and difficult to get involved in chat, it's impossible to ask every member for their individual opinions. Just as admin took on board the above complaints, I'm sure those opposed to the 80 per room limit will also be considered. The final point I wish to put forth is that the limit imposed was never set in stone. It has always been experimental and admin is taking time to consider the 80 limit and how it effects the chat and users. It's probably not something that could be determined in say only a week for example.
To those unhappy with the limit, I would just say bear with us. It's a process and it's meant for the good of the site. Scouts honor! :2fingers:
Please Note: If you attempt to enter a ""full" room and a blank screen is given, you will still gain entrance to the room by simply waiting. The wait period is variable, but rarely takes more than several minutes. By being patient and waiting instead of simply leaving and trying to log back in, you will likely gain access to the main room much quicker and avoid further frustration.
