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midnightchat
Over 90 days ago
Female, 48
0 km · Mayo
Forum
Alquigs it's just like a great big social where everyone is so much friendlier and people mix more than they would at a wedding for example. While people can be quite excited and the flirt level can be at overdrive, it would always hopefully be borne in mind that it is better for us as a group if any civilians or venue employees in the vicinity would remain unaware of what we are there for, hence a certain level of decorum is expected.
It is the PERFECT opportunity to make connections with a view to future meets etc. Plus it is ideal for getting yourself known which makes life easier on the chat rooms.
It is the PERFECT opportunity to make connections with a view to future meets etc. Plus it is ideal for getting yourself known which makes life easier on the chat rooms.
Quote by ALT3RN8
banks takin 5 workin days to clear a cheque... loada bollox in this day and age theyre well able to use technology when it suits them
Totally agree, I can go lodge a cheque in my bank, walk outside and remove the cheque value from the ATM. If I ask for the cash at the cash desk I am told no sorry you have to wait until it has cleared........emmmmmmmm I beg to differ!
Hmmmmmmmmmm joined January 30th 2011 and now crying about cliques and lack of response......... I know someone who buys a book, goes home and turns to the last chapter and reads that to see how it ends first, I'm unsure if he ever actually reads it in its entirety. Not exactly the kinda guy I'd invite to come meet me at the library!
Quote by longshot
I have other views I'd like to post in time. But would this be wise in the long term...
Nick
Probably not wise, but none the less you are entitled to so why shouldn't you! Pass no heed if my post sounded grumpy, I just dislike when people dictate what is correct etiquette. Answer your mail or don't answer it........ it's no one else's business. I've posted in the past in support of solo males on this site and why they have enhanced my enjoyment of the site and probably kept me as an active member in the early days. My first few months here I conducted 90% of my chat in whispers with these solo males and if truth be told I think the females would concede that it was attention from these guys that made us enjoy the site and keep using it. Now I understand that this isn't to be applied as the opinion of all females but all I'm gonna say in closing this post is that at some point, a high proportion of us females will be mothers to sons. Their time to go out in the world will come ....... perhaps we should try to treat the men here like we would hope our sons would be treated,,,,,,,,, even though they can sometimes be eejits!
Naughty darlin' sorry you're not enjoying youre time and feel as if it is a personal response to you or the fact you are 'new'. Believe it or not it's something we all experienced, it's a test of your mettle if you make it through........ ha ha only joking. It's like entering earth's atmosphere from space, you might orbit for a wee while but when you find your window you shoot straight through.
Yes it seems like there are clicks, and others are quick to jump on this bandwagon, but don't get caught up in this. There are groups of friends who know each other, meet regularly and always enjoy each others company. Now if that's what you are looking for then you are definitely in the right place. I have been very lucky here in that I was quite shy when I first joined. I only whispered and met single guys, but then I got chatting to a female member of a couple and had a blast. Eventually we all met up and things just took off from there, it's the best thing I ever did. It's through this friendship..........oh excuse me, it's from joining this click...... that I met so many more lovely members on this site and had the opportunity to attend parties and meet n greets, cus this couple let me tag along. I have had the best laughs on nights out through this place and have made some fantastic memories, but I was on site for about 18 months before this happened. You're doing fine so far, stick with it and don't let your outlook become jaded prematurely.
Yes it seems like there are clicks, and others are quick to jump on this bandwagon, but don't get caught up in this. There are groups of friends who know each other, meet regularly and always enjoy each others company. Now if that's what you are looking for then you are definitely in the right place. I have been very lucky here in that I was quite shy when I first joined. I only whispered and met single guys, but then I got chatting to a female member of a couple and had a blast. Eventually we all met up and things just took off from there, it's the best thing I ever did. It's through this friendship..........oh excuse me, it's from joining this click...... that I met so many more lovely members on this site and had the opportunity to attend parties and meet n greets, cus this couple let me tag along. I have had the best laughs on nights out through this place and have made some fantastic memories, but I was on site for about 18 months before this happened. You're doing fine so far, stick with it and don't let your outlook become jaded prematurely.
Outdoorsins, please accept this response is not aimed at you or any material you have posted, nor any other posters on this forum. It is just a good post for some of us to air our own feelings on the matter and our observations. The 'this site is shite, no one is shagging' attitude is wearisome. As Titan has said, some have no problem gaining what they seek and plan on continuing this enjoyment for as long as possible. In this case I must say it seems you get out of it what you put into it. Numerous threads have been posted on why there is no response, why no meets etc. The response is always an overwhelming 'become active in chat, use the forums to familiarise other people with you, contribute in some way'. Time and time again you see the response to this....'oh I don't have time to dedicate to that' ...... well in that case stop your whinging, you wouldn't take up horticulturalism if you lived in a high rise flat and worked 12 hours a day now would ya......
As for those who seem eager to move forward, to actually meet and enjoy the site for what it was intended, I'm afraid we all learn at some point that some are just fantasists. Some like the idea of meeting, the thrill, the anticipation, the talk and build-up. While they may say to themselves they will meet, I'm unsure that they ever will. Some over-sell themselves, they discuss what they imagine themselves doing but have never done, but nerves or lack of confidence means they won't. They stress the 'performance anxiety' and bottle it then. To avoid admitting this they get bitchy or just straight out blank you... Without doubt some who have to cancel have genuine reasons, but their behaviour and how they handle this should sort the fantasists from the 'real swingers'.
It is partly due to this that people form their unofficial groups. I hate the 'C' word. They have met, they know that they will all contribute to a meet and have proven their demeanour. Or they have been mentioned by other friends. Time, effort, money and a lot of other factors go into a meet usually, to have it spoilt is shameful and as such people have every right to be defensive and protective of their enjoyment. After a while, and some disappointments, you develop your own trigger points, that make you say hmmmmmm not sure about this one, not gonna depend on it.
As for those who seem eager to move forward, to actually meet and enjoy the site for what it was intended, I'm afraid we all learn at some point that some are just fantasists. Some like the idea of meeting, the thrill, the anticipation, the talk and build-up. While they may say to themselves they will meet, I'm unsure that they ever will. Some over-sell themselves, they discuss what they imagine themselves doing but have never done, but nerves or lack of confidence means they won't. They stress the 'performance anxiety' and bottle it then. To avoid admitting this they get bitchy or just straight out blank you... Without doubt some who have to cancel have genuine reasons, but their behaviour and how they handle this should sort the fantasists from the 'real swingers'.
It is partly due to this that people form their unofficial groups. I hate the 'C' word. They have met, they know that they will all contribute to a meet and have proven their demeanour. Or they have been mentioned by other friends. Time, effort, money and a lot of other factors go into a meet usually, to have it spoilt is shameful and as such people have every right to be defensive and protective of their enjoyment. After a while, and some disappointments, you develop your own trigger points, that make you say hmmmmmm not sure about this one, not gonna depend on it.
You should drop down and I will give you some :swingingchair:
Quote by redlace
I have met some fantastic men here which is why I have no hesitation in recommending them to others. It's just frustrating to watch people shoot themselves in the foot over the most basic of things, or people belittling the site as being full of wasters when in fact they might need to amend their own attitudes to be a little more successful.
exactly, totally, absolutely!!
I met some nice guys in my time I guess I've just been lucky.
But talking to them I hear their frustrations and it not nice..
There are 100 guys to one girl on here and its hard I understand for a bloke to score some times.
Girls if you get an email or a number the polite thing to do if not interested is too just say it! I don't believe in just ignoring someone totally, even when you have been in touch for a while.
I am happy to answer if we have been talking.
Not pissing any one off here just putting my view in.
What I actually meant is the guys who shoot themselves in the foot on chat, whispers don't bother me but it is quite evident that they do annoy some users. So is it that hard to ask permission. I also meant rude behaviour on chat in general, comments may be directed to one person in particular, but a lot of the time the people you actually want to make contact with are watching this behaviour...... no harm in attempting to make a good impression. I wasn't making reference to mailing issues, as I don't use that medium often. My choice not to is my business and whether you intended to offend or not I do not believe I need to defend my behaviour to you or anyone else in this respect, I did not join a penpal club. I'm tired of discussing this issue, it is listed on numerous threads, I don't answer mail and I will apologise to no one for it.
Quote by icer11
Midnight, yes, its strange if guys send u a mail when you have clearly stated "not meeting anyone new", However, its also very annoying that when a couple or a single fem , have in there "looking for " column, "single guys", you send them a pm, and they reply ,sorry not looking for single malesfrustraing
I totally agree, I think profiles should be worded thoughtfully, not just for what you want but also to ensure that people do not waste their time or suffer an uneccessary rejection. This goes across the board in life not just in here. I am currently seeking work and applied for a job where they highlighted the type of person they were looking for. Now they did state experience in a certain field was DESIRABLE but not necessary as full training would be given. Application sent off and replied to about 10 minutes later.......'Dear Mid, thanks for your application but you have no experience in the DESIRABLE field so you won't be progressing any further.' I was so annoyed at this that a sent back a polite email saying
'Dear Ms. ****,
thank you for your response. I was prompted to apply by the following text on your advertisement '***or **** experience desirable, but not essential, as full training will be provided'. Perhaps you may wish to review that statement in order that people do not needlessly forward their personal details to you.'
Likewise here, it might be a good idea to review our profiles to ensure we are not 'falsely advertising' every once and a while. Better to be clear in our requirements and state these openly. By rights I should state on my profile that I don't usually answer mail, but this is too black and white and would suggest I do not want to receive ANY mail. It might discourage mail of any sort.
Quote by icer11
Thanks midnight ,I found that tab all right but it's saying "disabled",and no joy when u click on it. But I'll keep trying...
Sorry I didn't realise that was the cause of your issue, users might also want to check their timezone in their settings also. Just for forum posts etc. mine was showing me on Malasian time for a while. Keep us updated here on how you get on, others are probably having the same issues.
A quick reminder that any avatar you might wish to use for your forum posts should not be of an adult nature. Avatars should not contain any adult material,no erections, no penetration, etc. etc. etc. As a rule of thumb if you're unsure just ask 'am I happy that my child, niece, nephew, neighbour's kid could access this site as a visitor and see this picture'. If the answer is no, then it's not suitable.
Also forum avatars should be uploaded using the AVATAR function and not the photo album route. Any charicatures etc uploaded as photos shall be declined as you the account holder must feature in any 'photo' you might submit. Your picture of Mickey Mouse added to your album will be deleted.
Also forum avatars should be uploaded using the AVATAR function and not the photo album route. Any charicatures etc uploaded as photos shall be declined as you the account holder must feature in any 'photo' you might submit. Your picture of Mickey Mouse added to your album will be deleted.
I think people join this site full of optimism and fantasies running rampant. When the response isn't what was hoped for it is always the site that is at fault...... countless forum posts advising on how to make progress here, established and active members sharing their take on how they managed to be successful and pro-active members arranging meet n greets for us all to meet and make connections suggest the site is real and perhaps members need to respond to the site, not the site respond to members. Time and effort are needed to develop this approach so unfortunately, despite outward appearances, this is seldom the place to find instant gratification.
hmmmmmmm stepping away from my earlier post cus I have no idea what this thread is about it seems. If anyone reading this feels I have commented on something they did in a covert way I apologise, I haven't a clue. Dunno about the rest of you but sometimes I am in no hurry to shower after sex, I like to keep the feel of it on me for a while...... as my avatar shows, I'm obviously durrrrrty!
Perhaps it's just a shyness on the person's part, I know I have no problem going to a party and doing whatever is done but I feel SOOOOOO cheeky asking do you mind if I use your facilities, when all the fun is over. Unless they turn around and say 'use the shower whenever you want' it takes some procrastinating on my part to actually come out with it and ask. I know I have driven 2 hours home and sank into a bath immediately rather than come out and ask..... but I'm just odd. So maybe the hosts might bear this in mind and just say it after the fun is over. :-o Oh and I don't sweat ha ha.
I agree, I was actually tired of all the canvassing and collections and the guilty feelings when I had to say 'sorry, no money'. I decided to nominate one charity each year and set up a standing order to them each month. My last one saw me sending €15 euro per month to Oxfam, and it allowed me to say to the countless collection people I would encounter each month, sorry but I contribute each month to my own nominated charity. I am now looking at this year's charity and am more inclined to support an Irish based, having supported a global one last year.
There are the normal ( . )( . ), the silicone ( + )( + ), the perfect (o)(o) Some are cold (^)(^) & some belong to grandmothers (./(./ And let’s not forget the very large (o Y o), the very small (.)(.) and the asymmetrical (•)(.) We love them all! say ┌Пâ”(â—‰_â—‰)┌П┠to Breast Cancer!
If you are picking a charity to support this year, perhaps this is one that might appeal to you. Please other members list your charity choices and why you might feel they are a worthy cause. Regrettably not all of us are in a position to support these causes as much as we would like, but any contribution is a good contribution.
If you are picking a charity to support this year, perhaps this is one that might appeal to you. Please other members list your charity choices and why you might feel they are a worthy cause. Regrettably not all of us are in a position to support these causes as much as we would like, but any contribution is a good contribution.
