Ways to annoy a bloke on swing

29 Jan 2011

Quote by redlace
I have met some fantastic men here which is why I have no hesitation in recommending them to others. It's just frustrating to watch people shoot themselves in the foot over the most basic of things, or people belittling the site as being full of wasters when in fact they might need to amend their own attitudes to be a little more successful.

exactly, totally, absolutely!!
I met some nice guys in my time I guess I've just been lucky.
But talking to them I hear their frustrations and it not nice..
There are 100 guys to one girl on here and its hard I understand for a bloke to score some times.
Girls if you get an email or a number the polite thing to do if not interested is too just say it! I don't believe in just ignoring someone totally, even when you have been in touch for a while.
I am happy to answer if we have been talking.
Not pissing any one off here just putting my view in.

What I actually meant is the guys who shoot themselves in the foot on chat, whispers don't bother me but it is quite evident that they do annoy some users. So is it that hard to ask permission. I also meant rude behaviour on chat in general, comments may be directed to one person in particular, but a lot of the time the people you actually want to make contact with are watching this behaviour...... no harm in attempting to make a good impression. I wasn't making reference to mailing issues, as I don't use that medium often. My choice not to is my business and whether you intended to offend or not I do not believe I need to defend my behaviour to you or anyone else in this respect, I did not join a penpal club. I'm tired of discussing this issue, it is listed on numerous threads, I don't answer mail and I will apologise to no one for it.

19 Feb 2011

I would be laid back type of guy. The sites are for the most part a womans world in my opinion. Thats cool though. Its never happened to me and maybe this post may start it lol but we all know women talk and whatever. However I've known guys crucified on here and other sites for not a lot. I think myself a lot of things should be kept to oneselves. A guy on receiving end has no chance. Firstly the girls usually rally round and secondly the guys normally support those gals to endear themselves to the girls. Some may not agree and you are entitled not to. Its just what I've seen myself over the years. Maybe reason I keep very much to myself. Hope this doesn't start me being seen as odd. Just my view. I respect all those who have theirs too. I enjoy the outlet here and have met some lovely people and to be honest not a truly bad one yet male or female. Long may it continue pardon the pun. I have other views I'd like to post in time. But would this be wise in the long term... Nick

19 Feb 2011

Quote by longshot
I have other views I'd like to post in time. But would this be wise in the long term...
Nick

Probably not wise, but none the less you are entitled to so why shouldn't you! Pass no heed if my post sounded grumpy, I just dislike when people dictate what is correct etiquette. Answer your mail or don't answer it........ it's no one else's business. I've posted in the past in support of solo males on this site and why they have enhanced my enjoyment of the site and probably kept me as an active member in the early days. My first few months here I conducted 90% of my chat in whispers with these solo males and if truth be told I think the females would concede that it was attention from these guys that made us enjoy the site and keep using it. Now I understand that this isn't to be applied as the opinion of all females but all I'm gonna say in closing this post is that at some point, a high proportion of us females will be mothers to sons. Their time to go out in the world will come ....... perhaps we should try to treat the men here like we would hope our sons would be treated,,,,,,,,, even though they can sometimes be eejits!

27 Mar 2011

Quote by midnightchat
l I'm gonna say in closing this post is that at some point, a high proportion of us females will be mothers to sons. Their time to go out in the world will come ....... perhaps we should try to treat the men here like we would hope our sons would be treated,,,,,,,,, even though they can sometimes be eejits!

Is that a bit of a matriarchic view though? Would it not be better to treat people based on the merits and shortcomings of their characters. While I would concede that a disproportionate amount of the men on this site behave 'like sons', it would be a shame to treat all the men here like that, it's in the nature of a swinging site will draw people who couldn't give a damn about swinging, but there are also genuine interested single males here, who do not behave like kids!
However, for the most part from what I see this seems to be the case, people who deserve to be treated with respect are rightly given it. This is a niche site just like any other. On forums people gang up on messers and trolls and innocent victims occasionally, there's always cliques, there's people who worship them, people who complain about them, and people who couldn't care less about them, that's life isn't it.

30 Mar 2011

Quote by longshot
I would be laid back type of guy. The sites are for the most part a womans world in my opinion. Thats cool though. Its never happened to me and maybe this post may start it lol but we all know women talk and whatever. However I've known guys crucified on here and other sites for not a lot. I think myself a lot of things should be kept to oneselves. A guy on receiving end has no chance. Firstly the girls usually rally round and secondly the guys normally support those gals to endear themselves to the girls. Some may not agree and you are entitled not to. Its just what I've seen myself over the years. Maybe reason I keep very much to myself. Hope this doesn't start me being seen as odd. Just my view. I respect all those who have theirs too. I enjoy the outlet here and have met some lovely people and to be honest not a truly bad one yet male or female. Long may it continue pardon the pun. I have other views I'd like to post in time. But would this be wise in the long term...
Nick

Enjoyed this post. Well said longshot, a lot of truth in what you are saying

30 Mar 2011

Quote by garble
l I'm gonna say in closing this post is that at some point, a high proportion of us females will be mothers to sons. Their time to go out in the world will come ....... perhaps we should try to treat the men here like we would hope our sons would be treated,,,,,,,,, even though they can sometimes be eejits!

Is that a bit of a matriarchic view though? Would it not be better to treat people based on the merits and shortcomings of their characters.
Hmmmmmmmmm I prefer yummy mummy to matriarch thank you! The absolute horror I have experienced at the thought of mothering anyone here is immeasurable, I had merely wanted to create an emotion or sentiment that our female members might find easier to reconcile to themselves. Fostering this attitude would then allow an atmosphere wherein each individual male could then display his own personal merits or shortcomings. While I'm sure that the mother reference prompted the 'matriarch' classification, I could equally have used the 'do onto others as you would have done onto you' reference.

11 Apr 2011

Quote by midnightchat
l I'm gonna say in closing this post is that at some point, a high proportion of us females will be mothers to sons. Their time to go out in the world will come ....... perhaps we should try to treat the men here like we would hope our sons would be treated,,,,,,,,, even though they can sometimes be eejits!

Is that a bit of a matriarchic view though? Would it not be better to treat people based on the merits and shortcomings of their characters.
Hmmmmmmmmm I prefer yummy mummy to matriarch thank you! The absolute horror I have experienced at the thought of mothering anyone here is immeasurable, I had merely wanted to create an emotion or sentiment that our female members might find easier to reconcile to themselves. Fostering this attitude would then allow an atmosphere wherein each individual male could then display his own personal merits or shortcomings. While I'm sure that the mother reference prompted the 'matriarch' classification, I could equally have used the 'do onto others as you would have done onto you' reference.
although i fecked up at girl4 meetn greet by turning up and not be certain what anyone actually looked like i have started to make amens at least by getting mimi a coffee,midnight your next on me list and i would just like to say there no way in hell i ever call ye a matriarch it be yummy yummy mummy all the way,just next time can ye just walk round pub blinking that way ye`ll be able to identify me,i`ll be the one holding up me boxers lol

30 Apr 2011

Quote by longshot
I would be laid back type of guy. The sites are for the most part a womans world in my opinion. Thats cool though. Its never happened to me and maybe this post may start it lol but we all know women talk and whatever. However I've known guys crucified on here and other sites for not a lot. I think myself a lot of things should be kept to oneselves. A guy on receiving end has no chance. Firstly the girls usually rally round and secondly the guys normally support those gals to endear themselves to the girls. Some may not agree and you are entitled not to. Its just what I've seen myself over the years. Maybe reason I keep very much to myself. Hope this doesn't start me being seen as odd. Just my view. I respect all those who have theirs too. I enjoy the outlet here and have met some lovely people and to be honest not a truly bad one yet male or female. Long may it continue pardon the pun. I have other views I'd like to post in time. But would this be wise in the long term...
Nick

It's always wise to post your opinions and you shouldn't feel that you can't or that doing so would be the wrong thing to do.

2 May 2011

Hi Longshot,
Interesting post. Of course there should be freedom of speech etc. etc. but I must admit that I have been put off quite a few guys by comments they've made in the forums. As you are well established and have excellent comments on your profile, I don't think you have much to worry about. However, if a guy wasn't as well established on the scene I think it would be a bit different. Obviously, we (all site members) are trying to form an impression of someone to see if we may be compatible or not and their profile & comments, their conversation in the chatroom and their posts in forums are all we have to go on initially. As, I am here for fun I find it a massive turn off if someone is negative, argumentative, pessimistic, cynical, irrational, etc. I joined this site to have a good time. In order to do that I want to meet guys who are going to make me laugh, be decent, be intelligent, be fun. I have no interest in bitching, complaining, arguing etc. so the faintest hint of that is going to turn me off.
You sound like a laid back, relaxed kind of guy so again, I really don't think you personally have anything to worry about, but I think some others would be doing themselves (and some of us who don't like reading their negativity) a favour if they were to edit themselves a bit more. So, I hope that's at least a little bit helpful. In conclusion, my own personal answer to your question "Is it wise to post here, I wonder?" is not always, no... as one may regret the consequences (turning people off). However, I personally find intelligent debate, funny posts etc. very attractive.
Peace out,
Eden xx

2 May 2011

Quote by Eden
Hi Longshot,
Interesting post. Of course there should be freedom of speech etc. etc. but I must admit that I have been put off quite a few guys by comments they've made in the forums. As you are well established and have excellent comments on your profile, I don't think you have much to worry about. However, if a guy wasn't as well established on the scene I think it would be a bit different. Obviously, we (all site members) are trying to form an impression of someone to see if we may be compatible or not and their profile & comments, their conversation in the chatroom and their posts in forums are all we have to go on initially. As, I am here for fun I find it a massive turn off if someone is negative, argumentative, pessimistic, cynical, irrational, etc. I joined this site to have a good time. In order to do that I want to meet guys who are going to make me laugh, be decent, be intelligent, be fun. I have no interest in bitching, complaining, arguing etc. so the faintest hint of that is going to turn me off.
You sound like a laid back, relaxed kind of guy so again, I really don't think you personally have anything to worry about, but I think some others would be doing themselves (and some of us who don't like reading their negativity) a favour if they were to edit themselves a bit more. So, I hope that's at least a little bit helpful. In conclusion, my own personal answer to your question "Is it wise to post here, I wonder?" is not always, no... as one may regret the consequences (turning people off). However, I personally find intelligent debate, funny posts etc. very attractive.
Peace out,
Eden xx

You're quite right there Eden I hate people who are bitching and complaining as well but believe it or not some guys may find this turn off also (not saying you're doing this btw) but are expected to put up with it and just be quiet or risk being alienated on the site.
People should treat others as they would have themselves treated, if you go by the principle that you don't care if you do anything to annoy a guy on here then why should a guy care if he does something to annoy a lady on here?

2 May 2011

Stig,
Could you clarify your point for me please - I don't understand what you're saying.
Thanks,
Eden.

2 May 2011

Quote by Eden
Stig,
Could you clarify your point for me please - I don't understand what you're saying.
Thanks,
Eden.

I was saying firstly you were correct in what you are saying Eden, but that men may find bitching and complaining a turn off also but that they are expected to put up with it or risk being alienated by some (not all) of the women on the site.
When you made your first reply to this post you made the point that (So my tuppence worth is guys don't complain or moan - man up, suck it up, and concentrate on impressing/charming us rather than telling us what annoys you because quite frankly "am I bovvered?") I made the point that everyone should treat others in the same way that you would like to be treated yourself. As i said also to finalise that if you you're not bothered if you do something to annoy a guy on here then how can you expect any guy on here if they do something to annoy you, you also said plenty more shoals of fish and all that well the same goes for guys on here also. Hope this clears things up biggrin

2 May 2011

Stig,
With all due respect, I have no interest in dredging up that old argument; it was months ago - I'm over it. I was solely answering Longshot's question.
Eden

3 May 2011

Quote by Eden
Stig,
With all due respect, I have no interest in dredging up that old argument; it was months ago - I'm over it. I was solely answering Longshot's question.
Eden

With all due respect to yourself also Eden I was leaving things at that and had no intention to post any more on the issue, you asked me to clarify further. Glad to see you're over it though biggrin

6 May 2011

Quote by Eden
I was solely answering Longshot's question.
Eden

Really? Were you now?
So you werent using a reply to another members post as camouflage in order to take a pop at someone who has been negative in the past? I ask this only as you do mention four times in the same post that somebody's/some people's negativity turns/has recently turned you off.
I dont want to seem in any way rude Eden, as I have always respected you highly and still do. However maybe the person/people you are referring to in your post doesnt want to "turn you on" as it were, but rather likes you and respects you for the person you come across as being. A highly intellingent, fair, well balanced, great conversationalist, funny, warm, articulate and overall nice person that you are.
Yes some, including myself have been negative and pessimistic in their posts recently, and yes this negativity is really not good for the overall wellbeing of both the site and its members in general, but more specifically the negative member/s in question.
You have said in the past that the forums should be used for fun and amusement of site members, and should never be used to take pops at said members, a sentiment that I fully agree with you on, regardless of the fact that I have been guilty of the above "crimes" myself.
I would say that should you have a problem with any person's negativity, then you should bring it to that person's attention through a private medium, and not use the forum as a vehicle to allow yourself the opportunity to do something that you have opposed in the past. Because as you already know, I have used the forums inappropriately, I have learned my lesson the hard way, and I'm sure the repercussions of my ill-judged actions will stay with me for a very long time to come.
As I'm sure you already are aware, I have always respected and still do respect your opinions in the forums. They have always been fair, valid, funny, articulate, informing, constructive, witty, and written with a high degree of intelligence.
However your reply post to Longshot above is the first of many many posts that you have published to which I am not so enamoured by.
Im just stating my opinion Eden, I'm not trying to be pessimistic or rude or come across as being negative in any way. I do hope you see the point I am trying to make and that both you and I are still good.
Regards,
Col

6 May 2011

Quote by alicolwic
Really? Were you now?

YES

7 May 2011

Wow! My ears are ringing after the loudness of that response :scared: Hope I can find a GP to check them out on a Saturday. I may have perforated an eardrum wink

:giveup:

7 May 2011

Lads and Lassies, Come on now Folks...Lets leave it there...The bitching will only spiril, i am not interested in who is right and who is wrong, dont be wasting all your energies in this post, when they could be used for better activities wink

so lets all relax and chill out and enjoy the lifestyle.. ....Now that calls for a Carlsberg lol

:lol:

7 May 2011

1st one is on me Kool, and the 2nd one too. :thumbup: Eden I'd also love to get you a drink in while I'm up at the bar if you wouldnt mind? :cheers:

10 Jun 2011

I reckon the worst way to annoy a guy on here is to whisper him in chat and ask is he a girl looking for some fun lol

:lol:

10 Jun 2011

Quote by shydublinguy
I reckon the worst way to annoy a guy on here is to whisper him in chat and ask is he a girl looking for some fun :lol:

:giggle::giggle::giggle::giggle::giggle::giggle::giggle:

11 Jun 2011

When some of the ladys plays the good ould mind games fecking hate that JMO.

11 Jun 2011

Quote by BIGGLES5000
When some of the ladys plays the good ould mind games fecking hate that JMO.

Sadly there is a small group of women who take joy out of doing that to people. A small minority i stress there.

11 Jun 2011

Quote by TheStig11
When some of the ladys plays the good ould mind games fecking hate that JMO.

Sadly there is a small group of women who take joy out of doing that to people. A small minority i stress there.
Sorry now for giving out but one thing that really annoy me is when you get what i call the list and been put on hold i know the ratio is higher for the single lads but when you get Lady's who say sorry i cant meet yea this weekend because I'm meeting someone then your left waiting four months down the line then they decide there not meeting anyone what a waste of time and effort i think if the Lady's are not interested they should say it will save all this stringing

12 Jun 2011

Quote by TheStig11
When some of the ladys plays the good ould mind games fecking hate that JMO.

Sadly there is a small group of women who take joy out of doing that to people. A small minority i stress there.
Just to add men do similar, a small minority thankfully.

11 Aug 2012

Bumping this also, for a sense of balance

12 Aug 2012

....to NOT answer his [b:cd3feb2bd2]continious[/b:cd3feb2bd2] whispers-[b:cd3feb2bd2]everytime[/b:cd3feb2bd2]- you're in chat....or drop everything/everyone and go into whisper with him dunno

:dunno: cyaaa bolt

:bolt:

12 Aug 2012

Quote by worshipme
....to NOT answer his continious whispers-everytime- you're in chat....or drop everything/everyone and go into whisper with him :dunno:
cyaaa :bolt:

lol

13 Aug 2012

Blokes shouldnt be annoyed - theres way too much honey on here to be annoyed.

23 Aug 2012

I think the main problem is there is just not enough honey for all the bee's, the ratio of male to female is far from equal and in any community that will inevitably lead to problems, it's survival of the fittest and the cream will rise to the top lol