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Favourite Quotations

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I have enjoyed actionmanbarbie’s fun threads and had thought, prior to also learning that actionmanbarbie had left the site, that a Quotations thread might be good fun too. So here goes. The idea is that you simply post a favourite quotation. The quotation can be a favourite or virtually anything you think might be worth posting. The theme can be sexual or general. If you like, it can be even a homemade quotation – ie one of your own. And if you have several favourite quotations worth posting, feel free to return to the thread several times to post again and again. I’ll offer three which I like – one is sexual, one is general and one is “homemade”. Heartiest Regards Cool Hand
“Treat your lover as someone worthy of seduction and as someone who deserves 
“Let’s see if tea and buns can make the world a better 
I attended a wedding lately and was unsure whether I’d have to give a speech. In the end there were no speeches, but I had done a little prep, just to be on the safe side. I find that the speeches at weddings I attend have two main elements – bad jokes and theoretical advice on marriage. I didn’t feel, as a divorced, middle-aged man, that I could give much advice to a couple half my age on love, as most other people were wont to do. From my own experiences and observations, though, I did feel I could offer something that had a depth of meaning. It ran like this: “I have great hopes for the relationship of two unselfish 
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars"
My favourite quote of all time, dear old Oscar biggrin but he had lots of good ones .
“Experience is the name every one gives to their 
“Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit”
Oscar Wilde
“Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea.
Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it”
Winston Churchill
Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don't walk behind me; I may not walk beside me and be my 
Albert Camus
No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there's too much fraternizing with the enemy.
Henry Kissinger
I am skilled at the art of love. I just wish I had a bigger paintbrush.
I guess you could call me a polygamist. Sometimes I switch hands.
Scott E. Roeben
My favourite quotes are from the worlds best ever football manager, Bill Shankly "Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I assure you, it's much more serious than that" Shankly And again when Tommy Smith after he'd turned up for training with a bandaged knee: 'Take that poof bandage off, and what do you mean YOUR knee, it's LIVERPOOL'S knee !'
All Woody Allen: "It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more." "Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon." "Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good." "I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me."
Has to be Mary Harney's to the pre budget meeting 'Lets screw the old fuc..ers'
Van Gogh cut off his ear gave it to a prostitute who flung it away in extreme disgust. Van, whores don't want ears they want money. I guess that's why you were such a great painter: you didn't understand much else. Charles Bukowski.
All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult. Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's family does too. Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!
madonna said... poor is the man, whos pleasures depend, on the permission of another....
its quality not quantity...darling...yikes its cold in here...
mmmm and quotes from madonna...or louis walsh..or david or victoria beckham..or girls aloud..should be in the really dont count quotes...are they are numbskulls... especially madonna... sorry......
"My ideal women? A lady in public and a whore in the bedroom" (unknown)
Thanks, everyone, for all the quotations. There are some brilliant ones there which I hadn't heard before. Here's another. Sigmund Freud this time... The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul, is "What does a woman want?"
No dora i think what he meant was "to LUBE or not to LUBE" well in my mind it was!!! lol
:smoke:i donot belive in the immortality of the indivual and i cosider ethics to be an axclusively humam concern with no superhuman authotity behind it . albert einstein :sticky:
It is a sad fact that 50 percent of marriages in this country end in divorce. But hey, the other half end in death. You could be one of the lucky ones! -- Richard Jeni
:devil:the great unmentionable evil at the center of our culture is a barbaric bronze age text known as the old testament, 3 anti- human religions have evolved-judaism christianty and islam .these are sky god religions. they are, literally patriarchal - god is the omnipotent father -hence the loathing of women for 2000 years in those countries afflicted by the sky god and his earthly male delegates .gore vidal:sticky::smoke:
Woody Allen on mastubation: 'Don't knock it...its sex with somebody you love.' and Allen again 'Sex between a man and a woman can be a wonderful thing, provided you get between the right man and woman.'
:clap:Nice one Tussey - good but a little heavy - The Christian resolution to find the world ugly and bad has made the world ugly and bad. Friedrich Nietzsche Just in terms of allocation of time resources, religion is not very efficient. There's a lot more I could be doing on a Sunday morning. Bill Gates The more I study religions the more I am convinced that man never worshipped anything but himself. Richard Burton I don't believe in God but I'm very interested in her. Arthur C. Clarke :smoke:Jax:inlove:
From Barfly: Hank: you don't believe in all that crap do you? Wanda: Course I do, the more shit you believe in the better off you are
There is a crack in everything That's how the light gets in. -Leonard Cohen
Don't cry because its over, Smile because it happened! u gotta love dr. seuss :happy: oh and good old marilyn can't remember where this one came from think a film dunno Some of the greater things in life are unseen thats why you close your eyes when you kiss, cry, or dream... good girls never make history
Imagine what you would do if you knew you couldn't fail.
"I could dance with you until the cows come home. On second thought I'd rather dance with the cows until you come home." "Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped." "Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." "Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others." ....all by the great Groucho Marx.
Recently I heard a 'wise guy' story that I had a party at my home for twenty-five men. It's an interesting story, but I don't know twenty-five men I'd want to invite to a party. Joan Crawford.
I'm delighted to see how many have added to this thread. Some great quotations there too. Thanks. indeed. And another couple: "We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth without producing it." "Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of opportunity." Both from George Bernard Shaw. Regards Cool Hand