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saturn
Over 90 days ago
Straight Female, 45
Ireland
Forum
I totally agree with guns , although I was thinking the way he is quiet awhile ago , I used to be here as a regular but now only pop in every now and again , reason for that not because of way chat is (different story altogether) , but I found during my cpl of years as a regular the site goes through a shift every now and again and the chat suffers from it , when I started first I found it hard to get in as most newbies do but then after awhile it was great , loved the chat and banter that went with it and the mix of people .but ive found that its not much fun anymore ..its as if people are taking them selves to serious and need to take their heads out of their arses , its not a popularity contest ( and yes of course I would like to be popular ) I think you get that from from being nice (cheesy as that sounds) not from putting people down just because you can ,Its like a school playground at times with different groups keeping to their place and god forbid you say something the popular kids dont like !! And as for some of the woman who think just cos they have tits and a vagina that they can act and say how they want to any poor guy who tries to chat to them .. get over yourselves .. and same to be said to guys who think just cos a woman is here shes available to anyone , Respect seems to be lacking here on so many levels and thats a huge problem , yes everyone is different and have their own guidelines so to speak but simply treating someone decently goes a long way ..Any newbie looking in at how people treat others at times in chat will run for cover or jump ship to other sites which is a shame cos when this site is good it really is and it has all the ingredients of being great but as SnS said the chatroom needs to be more welcoming , the site owners have made great changes , from what ive seen the mods seem to be running things smoothly so that just leaves the members themselves , I think perhaps the balance of people just isnt quiet right at the moment ... hopefully it will rectify itself as it has in the future ...
oh and for those who know me from before ...yep ive made huge mistakes b4 .. not preaching at anyone just voicing my opinion !
Hey ,
Don't think you will get masacered ..your post wasn't to whingy lol
Im only speaking for myself here but I think the reason a lot of genuine single males find it hard is because of the messers, Its hard to break in as you have to prove your for real which is impossible if someone doesn't give you a chance (rock nd hard place ) and there are so many single males here looking for the exact thing you are !!Only advice I can give you is keep trying .. keep being polite ..and try to get involved in chat .. if you pick a quieter time when the rooms aren't full , it is a lot easier to get involved , if you build up a bit of banter with some of the members ..the rest will follow .If your using mails try nd make it stand out ..the volume of mail people get here is high so more than a one liner gets you further !! Also maybe try one of the meet and greets , even if you don't end up playing .its a great way to put faces to the names and to get yourself noticed and more importantly show that your real and genuine and will turn up when you say you will , there's nothing worse than a no show ..hope that helps a bit .. good luck !!!
Mods are needed ...
The rules are there for everyone to see before they join up , If the world was perfect and everyone read those rules and followed them , then there would be no need for moderation , but it isn't .For example : There are people on site who think that just because they are not face to face with someone that they have the right to hurl abuse .. While on site you may be dealing with people behind computers but those people still have rights and feelings , if you chatted up a person in a club and were refused most civilised people accept that and walk away but on site some people seem to think that a refusal gives them the right to verbally attack the other person .. you do that in the real world and your thrown out on your ass .. why should it be any different here ??
Yes there are some rules on site I think a bit harsh at times but there needed , simple as that , and with rules come moderators , Ive seen it from both sides of the fence and trust me you need to have the patience of a saint to be a mod .. when you have some ass that decides to pick at every little rule while at the same time calling you and half the room every name under the sun and all you can do is quote rules to him when you really want to tell him what a fucking wanker he is .. it isn't easy .. these sort of threads have been going around since mods were first here .. user names may change , views may be slightly different but bottom line is like it or lump it .. mods are needed and are here to stay .
And no I'm not kissing ass (b4 anyone jumps to that conclusion ) . I don't always agree with the mods but hey Id gladly run over my dentist with my car .. buts shes needed and overall does a good job !!!
I havent used the site much in the last while but used to frequent it a lot ,I can see this point from both sides of the fence as I used to be a mod at one point ,
Yes mods do take dislikes to certain people ,no body likes everyone ! They are only human and are here on site for the same reason as everyone else .
A GOOD mod will put those feelings aside when dealing with issues (not always easy to do )
In regards to mods being unpaid ... as was said here upon signing up to be a mod we all know what is asked of us so I think using that as a defensive answer is pointless,
The reason I felt the need to respond to this thread was I was slightly surprised by Admins response " Stop posting bollix"
Yes I agree wholeheartedly that the majority of bullying and stirring is done by members but the mods(not all of them ) have been guilty of it as well so It was a valid point to be raised and I think that response from Admin seemed so strange,
People are told if there is a problem with a mod to feel free to report it to Admin direct but seeing a reply like that to a legigitmate point doesnt seem to give people much confidence in the complaint process (apologies to Admin if I have misread what you meant , always previously found the Admin team to be fair )
Oh and ill add I dont think I was the perfect mod when I was doing it , Ive made my fair share of mistakes . Mods are 100% necessary and the majority of them do a fantastic job helping with the running of the site but there are some who are not and that is a valid point to make .
Yes mods do take dislikes to certain people ,no body likes everyone ! They are only human and are here on site for the same reason as everyone else .
A GOOD mod will put those feelings aside when dealing with issues (not always easy to do )
In regards to mods being unpaid ... as was said here upon signing up to be a mod we all know what is asked of us so I think using that as a defensive answer is pointless,
The reason I felt the need to respond to this thread was I was slightly surprised by Admins response " Stop posting bollix"
Yes I agree wholeheartedly that the majority of bullying and stirring is done by members but the mods(not all of them ) have been guilty of it as well so It was a valid point to be raised and I think that response from Admin seemed so strange,
People are told if there is a problem with a mod to feel free to report it to Admin direct but seeing a reply like that to a legigitmate point doesnt seem to give people much confidence in the complaint process (apologies to Admin if I have misread what you meant , always previously found the Admin team to be fair )
Oh and ill add I dont think I was the perfect mod when I was doing it , Ive made my fair share of mistakes . Mods are 100% necessary and the majority of them do a fantastic job helping with the running of the site but there are some who are not and that is a valid point to make .
