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alex_kink
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 44
0 km · Dublin
Forum
Warming the Bed
Quote by user=admin
Someone mentioned alchhol, it maybe worse in many ways but it isn't illegal to talk about
When has it been illegal to talk about drugs?
Hmmmm do you not think this is a bit OTT. So far on this site ive seen backlash for people using bad language, for people talking about fetishes (panties rooms being closed down for instance), for people having a perfectly legit piece of heated debate, for people giving out their OWN number (which I find bizarre!! lol) and now a kick and instant white wash for people even saying a word... cocaine.. it doesn’t matter what context its in. Its just a word.
Can somebody please explain to me why on an adult themed site people are so restricted in what they say?
And actually im pretty laid back and having a great time on this site but im finding the cumulative effect of these things sits uneasy in the back of mind and its pretty irksome. It be good to know the real reasoning behind all this because its certainly not setting a 21st century tone. In my eyes anyway.
Warming the Bed
This guy opens his mouth and gets judged back into the stoneage. It seems to me that a lot of people are looking for affairs and a bit on the side and this isnt gonna go away. Instead they will just go into the shadows and go about their business in a more covert way... judging them will just lead to more deception all around. At least if people were able to express themselves properly others can make informed decisions.
To morally judge somebody for cheating while carrying on your own particular diverse sexual habits is the height of hypocrisy as far as im concerned.
You make think this is bizarre but what if somebody had a fetish for cheating. Do they not have the right to express their sexuality on this site??
Warming the Bed
Ive seen this before on other forums where the long term pro takes a step back from the flock and slips into the shadows to sit on their grievances. Theres a technical term for it too...its called being a forum whore. Fair play. As far as I can see though this is the only thread with any legs on it! So curb your enthusium mate. Im sure other people who do look at these forums from time to time would like to make some comments. Like me 
Its interesting how people feel this place has deteriorated. It just shows what they actually value... the community spirit, the touching friendships etc etc or blah blah as some would put it.
I respect that but I see things differently. I put more of a premium on actually the private relationships you build up with people which inevitably lead to real life meets and something with a bit more substance. Everybody knows in real life people who spread themselves thinly and everybody knows they always turn out to be dickheads so why is it a surprise that it happens here. This place has way more thin spreaders than real life... even to enter into the bitching and taking a territorial space is actually admitting youve been seduced by this yourself.
What missing is all this, and doesn’t get mentioned I think ,is this site is great for what it does... it hooks people up!! Ive found ive gravitated to the right people naturally and its not too difficult to get there. Anybody can see just glancing at this site is making a lot of good real life communications ... what more can you ask for! Maybe if people did retreat a bit into those experiences theyve had they wouldn’t do it down so much.
Its interesting how people feel this place has deteriorated. It just shows what they actually value... the community spirit, the touching friendships etc etc or blah blah as some would put it.
I respect that but I see things differently. I put more of a premium on actually the private relationships you build up with people which inevitably lead to real life meets and something with a bit more substance. Everybody knows in real life people who spread themselves thinly and everybody knows they always turn out to be dickheads so why is it a surprise that it happens here. This place has way more thin spreaders than real life... even to enter into the bitching and taking a territorial space is actually admitting youve been seduced by this yourself.
What missing is all this, and doesn’t get mentioned I think ,is this site is great for what it does... it hooks people up!! Ive found ive gravitated to the right people naturally and its not too difficult to get there. Anybody can see just glancing at this site is making a lot of good real life communications ... what more can you ask for! Maybe if people did retreat a bit into those experiences theyve had they wouldn’t do it down so much. Warming the Bed
Quote by user=dickandjane
So Alex I think you write up is some what miss guided, a single female who is bi or a married one for that matter will always take her time and find the type of woman she is interested in not just meet swing fuck as you put it.
cuz thats what I said
Warming the Bed
Actually... I dont wanna push the boat out, but these cpls im talking about, the fem is intrested in guys. Again I dont wanna tar everybody with the same brush but my experiences on this site of mmf have been with people that say bi fem, wanting a mff threesome on their profile. Also just chatting ive had women say directly this to me.
Im talking about the representation here... mff gets an over representation... its not talking away from the many bi women and cpls who have happy mff sexlives.
So ill add to my point, this over representation actually leads to an under representation of mmf. I could imagine this to be because mff is portrayed to be a natural act etc but im not sure about that so dont quote me.
Warming the Bed
As an interested bystander ive seen the frustration of cpls over getting an mff organised and more importantly having a fem cancel at the last minute. Let me give you my point of view... I don’t think it’s good to take profiles on face value...
Firstly I think mff is over represented. As you can see there are many, many profiles... men (its number one fantasy apparently), cpls and women advertising and promoting mff but I think the pull of it, when it comes to getting your rocks off, is not actually what gets a lot of people going. For some of these cpls it’s actually the guys predominating fantasy and bringing his gf/wife into this (not coercion... that’s different). Forinstance it’s the guy writing the profile but when you actually chat it’s the fem online and she seems to say something quite different. It’s a rare event indeed for a guy pushing a mff to succeed because women are a lot shrewder to their own needs. To me a real MFF is fem pushed and more resembles a polyamourous relationship that anything else. Women are much more inclined to build a friendship and relationship before making that a sexual reality so theres a lot more time to consider it, and let the deeper psychology bubble to the surface. Is this person really bi? Who am I doing this for? De de de... theres much less of the more simple mmf method... meet, swing, fuck...
Also theres a lot of bisexual and bi curious fems on the site (more than st8!) which is a bit hard to believe on a site that doesn’t particularly cater to the gay community. Many gay women and a lot of bi women wouldn’t use a gay based site because of the harassing comments of straight guys on a site like this so you’re dealing with people who wouldn’t event go there.
This isn’t to take anything away from the genuine cpls and fems who are into mff and are active, and fair play to ya... It just seems to me to get two true bi sexual women who are willing to share that out with one particular guy is more unique that widely believed and there a lot more emotional and psychological barriers to overcome before a successful meet. Just my two cents.
