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Quote by user=jimmybones
Go back to your wife, this site's for swingers not cheaters.
This is being devoured, imo anyway, no one has the right to say that online, I won't aplogise for thinking that..That statement smacks of judgement nothing less.
I respect everyones point of view, but judging someone, especialy someone being honest, i can never condone.
Then please quote the post when making a statement such as that at the start instead of now.
Like we have said and will say again this site is a swingers site & each to their own !
This is being devoured, imo anyway, no one has the right to say that online, I won't aplogise for thinking that..That statement smacks of judgement nothing less.
I respect everyones point of view, but judging someone, especialy someone being honest, i can never condone.
Like we have said and will say again this site is a swingers site & each to their own !
Quote by user=addiesfun
Go back to your wife, this site's for swingers not cheaters.
This is being devoured, imo anyway, no one has the right to say that online, I won't aplogise for thinking that..That statement smacks of judgement nothing less.
I respect everyones point of view, but judging someone, especialy someone being honest, i can never condone.
Quote by user=sexycpl4u
Hi Echo
Then the question should do i part ways with his or her partner. No matter what way you look at this that it is cheating and as for swinging it is of both partners consent that they swap partners open and honest with each other.
So in a nutshell the guy in question really shouldn't be on a swingers site.
But everyone in life has a choice in what they choose to do.
go for it jimmy its too frustrating to go without
Very interesting reading but at the end of the day (and probably start and middle too) we are adults responsible for our own choices and living with the consequences. It is not for any of us to force our views and morals (if we have any) on others!!! We all chose to join this site and to swing I am sure there are plenty who would seek to condemn us for that but they can keep their opinion to themselves as far as we are concerned even if we believe they have a right to have an opinion.
Hiya
Have to agree with you also like you have said everyone has a right to opinions :
Have to agree with you also like you have said everyone has a right to opinions :
Quote by user=two4fun
Very interesting reading but at the end of the day (and probably start and middle too) we are adults responsible for our own choices and living with the consequences. It is not for any of us to force our views and morals (if we have any) on others!!! We all chose to join this site and to swing I am sure there are plenty who would seek to condemn us for that but they can keep their opinion to themselves as far as we are concerned even if we believe they have a right to have an opinion.
Warming the Bed
This guy opens his mouth and gets judged back into the stoneage. It seems to me that a lot of people are looking for affairs and a bit on the side and this isnt gonna go away. Instead they will just go into the shadows and go about their business in a more covert way... judging them will just lead to more deception all around. At least if people were able to express themselves properly others can make informed decisions.
To morally judge somebody for cheating while carrying on your own particular diverse sexual habits is the height of hypocrisy as far as im concerned.
You make think this is bizarre but what if somebody had a fetish for cheating. Do they not have the right to express their sexuality on this site??
Excellent point on the fetish for cheating Alex-Kink, many people cheat on partners due the fact they are hooked on the covert nature of the deception involved..
They become addicted to the thrills of seeking new sexual partners , same with many I guess seeking sexual pleasures, just differnet circumstances...
Lord I wish the original OP would come back, and give us some more insgiht into his reasons for cheating..
I'm not the original poster....but am in the same position - here without the knowledge of my spouse.
I can understand the objections that have been expressed, but people need to realise that not all relationships can be as open as theirs. My wife and I enjoy an almost perfect relationship in nearly every way...until we reach the bedroom. She is a very conservative lady, and has pretty much admitted that she just was keeping me happy while we were going out etc. Now that we've been married a while things have slowly changed, until our current sex life is once a fortnight (if not a month), no oral (either way), 2 positions only and not on a worknight. How many of the people on this site would be happy with that? The biggest problem I find is the feeling of not being wanted....ie....if I don't start it....nothing will happen.
Now...maybe this is the wrong site for someone like me....but it is a site full of people who are relaxed in their own sexuality...where better to meet someone to talk about sex?
I have no wish to leave my wife and my own particular logic was that someone who is on this site would understand that and there was less danger of a serious attachment developing than...say...meeting someone in a pub and starting an affair.
Funnily enough, since I've been on the site I haven't had any extra sex, but have had plenty of chats which have helped me to realise that I'm not the only person in the world that feels this way and that I'm not as alone as I thought.
Thats my story....hopefully it might give you an insight into the mindset of some of the married guys on here. You may not agree and thats fine, but my outlook has always been live and let live, and I would hope others would show me and people in our position the same respect.
Ok , i'm not going to sit in judgement on this...
But i would like to say this
after talking to lots of girls on this site. you may have well shot urself in the foot with this thread.. most of the girls on this site just wouldnt go with a married man if there wife wasnt there.. also, alot of the men in couples on this site really just wouldnt consider u as suitable to join in there fun, as u obviously have problems at home..
See believe it or not, we are all comfortable with the lifestyle we have chosen, and the way we select people to join us
Ok , i'm not going to sit in judgement on this...
But i would like to say this
after talking to lots of girls on this site. you may have well shot urself in the foot with this thread.. most of the girls on this site just wouldnt go with a married man if there wife wasnt there.. also, alot of the men in couples on this site really just wouldnt consider u as suitable to join in there fun, as u obviously have problems at home..
See believe it or not, we are all comfortable with the lifestyle we have chosen, and the way we select people to join us.. It is not as some think.. We dont just say hi to someone and jump into bed with them, we do not sleep around, and we do not do it without our partners either knowing, or being there....
See, what we do is not cheating.. and we are all happy with our partners, and alot of the girls if they read this thread will remember u.
Quote by user=babychicks
Ok , i'm not going to sit in judgement on this...
But i would like to say this
after talking to lots of girls on this site. you may have well shot urself in the foot with this thread.. most of the girls on this site just wouldnt go with a married man if there wife wasnt there.. also, alot of the men in couples on this site really just wouldnt consider u as suitable to join in there fun, as u obviously have problems at home..
See believe it or not, we are all comfortable with the lifestyle we have chosen, and the way we select people to join us.. It is not as some think.. We dont just say hi to someone and jump into bed with them, we do not sleep around, and we do not do it without our partners either knowing, or being there....
See, what we do is not cheating.. and we are all happy with our partners, and alot of the girls if they read this thread will remember u.
Hi Babychicks, interesting comment - what I would say is that I wasn't complaining that people won't let me join in their fun nor did I suggest that people just jump into the sack with anyone -I'd agree there has to be some sort of friendship / bond there. If sex is all someone is after there are plenty of places to buy it.
My point was that I'm going to be honest about my situation and let things fall as they may. If people do not want to meet me, thats fine, if we meet and just become friends, thats fine, and if we meet and more happens...well obviously thats more than fine.
I could not lie and suggest I was single just to get some girls into bed, honour amongst thieves and all that. Maybe I have a twisted morality but thats just me.
I don't wish to get into a 'moral' debate here (I placed that bit in the Anything goes forum)....but would love to nonetheless.
I don't think the first post here is right in wanting an affair. I also don't think that the assassination of that post is right either. But then maybe they are not wrong either.
Confused? :-?well that is natural because of the potential of 'morals' creeping in.
It does seem as though a swinging site such this has multiple meanings of 'swnging' anyway...eg are dogging, 'Singles Flirting', 'XDs',TS etc etc 'Swinging'? no. But that doesn't mean that they have no place here.
I don't think that this site is a place to 'guarantee' a good chance of 'cheating' anyway. :violin:
I would, however, say to someone considering having an affair (if they can't speak to their wife about problems) that they should join this site.....what they will get is a good overall view of a group of people who are out to have fun. Where general and often light-hearted (and very humorous) discussion on sex and other things are brought On-Line without the heaviness of, say, a dating site. The forums and chat-rooms (that are brilliantly whacky at times) will soon get someone thinking twice about 'cheating' when they discover that there is more out there in 'sex-land' than just getting your end away.
As for the 'descriptions' on people's profile:
there were some bizarre choices available when signing-up. I, for example, was best described by them as 'almost divorced'. Not sure what it really means, but I will be when my wife get's her solicitor to send me some documents for the first time. The descriptions places me as 'single male'.....but where is the sign-up choice to select "Still Married but now lives with Girlfriend"? {by the way, in case anyone is wondering...I did not hook-up with my present girlfriend whilst I was with my wife. I do have certain morals!!!}
I'm sure that there are married ladies out there who are also looking for a bit-on-the-side. Good luck to 'em.
Maybe 'Cheating' is really an excuse to stay with someone that you'd rather not be with? who knows? I don't.
Unless you're partner is realy awful, the grass is never ever greener...it may be different.....and you may take some welcomed (?)(secret) experience back to your partner (so long as it isn't something that get's them to the STD clinic), and you may realise that you actually already have what you're looking for.
Jo and Co.
I don't think the first post here is right in wanting an affair. I also don't think that the assassination of that post is right either. But then maybe they are not wrong either.
Confused? :-?well that is natural because of the potential of 'morals' creeping in.
It does seem as though a swinging site such this has multiple meanings of 'swnging' anyway...eg are dogging, 'Singles Flirting', 'XDs',TS etc etc 'Swinging'? no. But that doesn't mean that they have no place here.
I don't think that this site is a place to 'guarantee' a good chance of 'cheating' anyway. :violin:
I would, however, say to someone considering having an affair (if they can't speak to their wife about problems) that they should join this site.....what they will get is a good overall view of a group of people who are out to have fun. Where general and often light-hearted (and very humorous) discussion on sex and other things are brought On-Line without the heaviness of, say, a dating site. The forums and chat-rooms (that are brilliantly whacky at times) will soon get someone thinking twice about 'cheating' when they discover that there is more out there in 'sex-land' than just getting your end away.
As for the 'descriptions' on people's profile:
there were some bizarre choices available when signing-up. I, for example, was best described by them as 'almost divorced'. Not sure what it really means, but I will be when my wife get's her solicitor to send me some documents for the first time. The descriptions places me as 'single male'.....but where is the sign-up choice to select "Still Married but now lives with Girlfriend"? {by the way, in case anyone is wondering...I did not hook-up with my present girlfriend whilst I was with my wife. I do have certain morals!!!}
I'm sure that there are married ladies out there who are also looking for a bit-on-the-side. Good luck to 'em.
Maybe 'Cheating' is really an excuse to stay with someone that you'd rather not be with? who knows? I don't.
Unless you're partner is realy awful, the grass is never ever greener...it may be different.....and you may take some welcomed (?)(secret) experience back to your partner (so long as it isn't something that get's them to the STD clinic), and you may realise that you actually already have what you're looking for.
Jo and Co.
Quote by user=jomor999
....Unless you're partner is realy awful, the grass is never ever greener...it may be different.....and you may take some welcomed (?)(secret) experience back to your partner (so long as it isn't something that get's them to the STD clinic), and you may realise that you actually already have what you're looking for.
Jo and Co.
Very interesting debate. I'll not reopen it as it seems to have more or less run its course.
Just wanted to ask if anyone remembers the storyline in the old Pina Colada song by Rupert Holmes.
For the record:
Escape (The Pina Colada Song)
By Rupert Holmes
I was tired of my lady, we'd been together too long.
Like a worn-out recording, of a favorite song.
So while she lay there sleeping, I read the paper in bed.
And in the personals column, there was this letter I read:
"If you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
If you're not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
I'm the lady you've looked for, write to me, and escape."
I didn't think about my lady, I know that sounds kind of mean.
But me and my old lady, had fallen into the same old dull routine.
So I wrote to the paper, took out a personal ad.
And though I'm nobody's poet, I thought it wasn't half-bad.
"Yes, I like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne.
I've got to meet you by tomorrow noon, and cut through all this red tape.
At a bar called O'Malley's, where we'll plan our escape."
So I waited with high hopes, then she walked in the place.
I knew her smile in an instant, I knew the curve of her face.
It was my own lovely lady, and she said, "Oh, it's you."
And we laughed for a moment, and I said, "I never knew"..
"That you liked Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
And the feel of the ocean, and the taste of champagne.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
You're the love that I've looked for, come with me, and escape."
"If you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
And the feel of the ocean, and the taste of champagne.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
You're the love that I've looked for, come with me, and escape."
It crossed my mind when I read Jo's last comment.
Heartiest Regards
Cool Hand
Well I always say don't shoot down honesty, because at least the guys and women who do say they are married are giving other members a clear choice..
There are a number of members who claim to be either divorced or single , yet the signs they are not are very easy to read, it is obvious that a wife, husband or partner is tucked away in the background
Honesty above all, and first be honest with yourself. I never disguise the fact i am married, and neither do i disguise that as adults we all can and should make choices for ourselves.
I respect a couple's choice not to meet with married people; likewise I would expect them to respect my choice to swing.
i have heard that song thousands and thousands of times and i never ever got it.....thanks for bringin it to my attention cool.....
Now on the topic of havin an affair......
If there is deception then it's not really fair....and thats what an affair is.....
deception......and it's not nice bein on the recieving end in any shape or form....
It's hurtful, soul destroying, it leaves the person whom has been left out of the loop a sense of low self worth.....the list is endless ans it takes a long long long long long time for them to recover.....
take care all
Quote by user=nibbles
i have heard that song thousands and thousands of times and i never ever got it.....thanks for bringin it to my attention cool.....
You're welcome, Nibbles. Actually, I rather like the song myself; it still get's played now and then on some radio stations.
Regards
Cool Hand
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