Is there many shades of Bi?

24 Apr 2012

This is something that I've come across on more than one occasion. Im not having ago at anyone in particular. No malice intended and none should be taken. I'd like to throw this out there and would love to hear some opinions on this. I'll try and be as up front and honest here. In my younger years I would have always considered myself straight and never really thought of myself to be curious to know what it would be like to touch or be touched by another woman. Well maybe I did but never felt the need to act on it. wink

Then I had a very hot experience with a sexy fem with an ex and I guess I've never looked back. For a while I would have considered myself Bi curious. More of a confidence thing really, rather than an uncertanty of if I was Bi. Its been a nice little journey and now I would say im Bi rather than curious. Im as happy playing with a fem as I am with a male. Lucky me. lol

So here's the thing. Im messaging and chatting to a couple and the fem states she is Bi, im very up front and open about being Bi and quiet happy to answer any questions they have but sometimes I haven't been afforded the same honesty back. Yes you guessed it. When it comes to the meet all of a sudden the goal posts are changed. In the middle of play you'll hear "I only recieve and don't give". Ya what mrs? :lol: I just don't get it, litrally. :lol: So is she Bi curious? Bi sexual? Or just plain Bi greedy? :lol: Can't help but feel a little duped. Anyway I lived and put it down as an experience and a good one all the same. Until......It happened again. It's not just me, I've chatted to other people and it does seem to be a common occurance. So has it got to the stage were you have to ask "excuse me but just how Bi are you?" before a meet. Just how many shades of Bi are there? :lol:

24 Apr 2012

There are 40 shades of green and as many ways to be bi........ Some take, some give, some take and give.. It can be a grey area with a lot of people and some are defo more bi than others. This goes for males and females. Some are curious, and up for a bit of a fumble but thats about all. It can be very frustrating if you are looking for one thing only to find out the couple / single is not into it, so its not going to happen. One of your topic of conversations before you meet up i would suggest... Interesting conversations over coffee comes to mind......lol Hope you find what your looking for. Sean xx

24 Apr 2012

I think if theyre unsure they need to stat this before the meet...anyways I called them girls who receive but dont give bi-selfish lol......na on serious note they need to be upfront and honest before the play begins ...Jilly xxxx

24 Apr 2012

Yes Sean, it is a topic of conversation for me before a meet. I don't play blind and I do like to get to know a couple and what the couple are into before I consider meeting for a drink/coffee. None of us like suprises. smile

It's not that the right questions aren't being asked. It's more of a lack of an honest response more than anything. Maybe we all have different ideas on what it is to be Bi. Just as you said 'there are many shades of green, there are many shades of Bi.' :)

24 Apr 2012

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

24 Apr 2012

fantacies are far more explicid than the reality an i feel that everyone has the right to change their mind on the night without being judged for it, im sure many of us have found our selves in suitations where we change our minds about what it is we want when it is in front of us.. tiny mawwwwwww i would lick your pussy with delight tho baby an not change my mind mmmmmm 69position

24 Apr 2012

Oh Lucy you have made my day. Yes please. lol

I think it wouldn't have made any difference who's pussy was plated in front of her. I respect everyones right to change their mind and their bounderies, after all we're not performing monkeys. :lol: Chemistry and spark is a must for a great night. Im afraid thats as Bi as she gets, a receiver and not a giver. As Shakespeare once wrote 'To Bi or not to Bi, that is the question.' lol

24 Apr 2012

A similar topic was brought up on the Bisexual forum before and I tend to agree with Sean that some tend to be alot more bi than others. I know alot of bisexual guys and gals and they all differ as to their sexual performative preferences. Without sounding crass some guys suck, some fuck, some gals kiss and some would delve deeper. I suppose it's a case of to each their own really, whatever they are comfortable with. It has been suggested that 'bi-selective' should be introduced as term after bi-curious and before bisexual. However, if someone has led you on to thinking they are all fully bisexual to the extent of full 1on1 sex and turn out the opposite, then that's worse than a no-show in my book lol

That's my tuppence worth anyway wink

24 Apr 2012

Tiny we have had pretty much the same issue, we have only met two fems here who do what they say on the tin. But having said that we havent met a lot of fems..thin on the ground lol. I am 100% bi and will put in a lot of effort but get put off when all the work with a fem is left to me. I do think more honesty is needed by females, we find the blokes tend to be more honest..well when you tell them how much it turns you on to see two blokes going at it hot and heavy they soon stop been bi, dont get me wrong i do like to see that but it is a way to weed out the fakers, people in general need to be honest and not have bi on their profile when they are not and if they are curious they need to say that so we all get what we want from a meet. Great profile btw...if people read all the way to the end then you know they are intrested..i read to the end lol

25 Apr 2012

Really helpful opinions everyone. Thanks for your input. xx I guess a bit more transparency is needed between folk. Jeyz I sound like a politician. As I was once told "I didn't lie to you, I was just economical with the truth." lol

25 Apr 2012

I am completely bi and always have been since before i ever even played with boys... I've played with girls one on one and in parties too... I like to give and take with a lady.. and a guy for that matter.. but.. just cause I'm bi doesn't make me want to play with every female... just as i might not want to play with every lad at a party.. i might snog him but not want to fuck him.. same with the girls.. I agree Tiny its not really fair to move the goal posts after the meet has begun, that would be like a lad arriving and u saying he can give u oral but no sex! lol

3 May 2012

So, maybe you might be interested in hearing a different perspective. I have never kissed a girl so I am not bi. I'm curious about women... I'd like to meet one and explore but, like I said, I'm not bi. My issue is that no more than none of us would want to be pressured to do a particular sex act in the heat of the moment, I'd not want to be pressured into moving further down the bi continuum until I felt comfortable. For this reason, I'm very upfront about it and would say that I am certain if the attraction was mutual I would kiss and booby play with a woman and any more than that, I'd not commit to. How could I, when I have no idea what it'll be like on the night, the chemistry, the mood, etc. However, everyone has to start somewhere and I'd not want to be pressured no more than the I'd want the couple to feel they'd been let down when I don't jump in the bi pool completely! So, it's tough to find a couple who are happy to take a chance with someone who is truly bi curious. Also, the attraction has to be there for the man and me as well, so it's another layer of complexity. So, that's my perspective.

3 May 2012

Nobody, I really enjoyed your perspective there. Your a very confident, articulate woman who is very tuned in to your needs. I like your honest upfront approach and you have just said in one paragraph what a lot of women and couples find hard to convey. I completely agree no-one should be pressured in anyway to do anything they don't want to do. Anyone worth their salt wouldn't. As you said mutual attraction, respect and that spark we like to call chemistry must be there. As also no expectations of what will happen. Great things seem to happen unexpectedly. wink

That's the good thing about this site, there is something for everyone. smile

No couple would feel let down by your honesty and would be very lucky to have your company. I really hope you enjoy your journey too. P.S If you fancy a dip in that pool I'll jump in with you. lol

3 May 2012

Hi there This is something I to have thought about over the years. Just how bi am I? Are there stages or levels of bi-ness? Just because I've had my cock sucked by a man and have sucked in return, I've also played alone, what level does that put me on? I recently heard it described as being bendie, which I kinda like. I don't push my bi curious side, its there and if it feels good (so to speak) great stuff. One of my most memorable meets I had was with a bi couple and it was amazing. I do think there are an awful lot of people who would love to try bi and are afraid. I once heard a guy say in all seriousness 'I don't want to turn gay'. being bi is not gay. I was that frightened soldier once and now am much happier. Give it a whirl. If you like it great and if you don't, move on - you will have grown as a person. I still have a preference for pussy but if the chemistry is right with a couple, fantastic - yahooo So in answer to your original posting; everybody must know where they stand, no maybe - maybe not. We're all adults here and lets have fun and enjoy ourselves. Interesting to see what other males/couple might think H

3 May 2012

Thanks, Tiny...everyone has to start somewhere and honesty is always the best place to start! Sure you might be the one to bring me into the fold, hehe... :swingingchair: