What can I say that you have not heard a thousand times already?Do I like to laugh?No, sorry, you've just bumped into the only person on the planet who doesn't like to laugh :P

"What are your hobbies?, give me something to talk about her!", I hear you cry. I love to cook, well I love to eat, being able to cook is just something learned out of necessity. I have spent too many evenings looking into my fridge after a whole day of work and thinking to myself "I need to get these pieces of food from their component parts into something edible before I kill myself" lol.

Sometimes I microwave my food, only to find that it is still a little cool on the inside. But instead of putting is back in the microwave for longer I just keep eating it anyway because life is pointless and entropy is unavoidable and the universe is filled with callous and casual destruction. As a result I do go to the gym, for my sins. Most of the time though I just sit there in the corner on a rowing machine, shrouded in shadow, staring balefully at all the beautiful people...I mean, why do they get to be so happy? :P

I'm a big animal lover..and I have only recently learned that on dating sites I need to me more specific, because a lot of you have sick fetishes.
What I mean to say is it breaks my heart to see an innocent animal struggle...not so much humans. I instinctively assume they're guilty until convinced otherwise. I'm that guy who says hello to a dog on the street but keep my eyes down and pretends not to notice when a person I know walks by. It's a good strategy anyway - how many times have you spotted someone you recognize on the street, you say hi and they say hi. Now your screwed. Do you stop?Do you keep going?Ah, I need an adult...wait a minute...I am an adult! Noooooooooooooo............

P.s, while we're talking about clarity, girls, be careful how you describe yourself on this. Just got off a profile where a girl said that she was "over the whole party scene, curvy, 5 foot 3 green eyes". Don't get me wrong, I like short girls, but three green eyes?No thanks.

Well you've read this far so I guess I can safely assume that you've hit rock bottom and your self-esteem is at an all time low...or for some strange reason you actually like what you see, so why not drop a message? Or it may be that you're just bored out of your mind in which case could discuss the big issues like why it is that boiling water makes eggs go hard but pasta go soft, I'm down for that too.